Driving Down The Block!

I know we've all heard of the Funk Master Flex Car Show and of course the television show called Pimp My Ride. But none of these shows have anything on Rolex Monterey Historic Automobile Races. This is where your bank roll gotta come from old money. How else are you gonna purchase a custom 1953 Chrysler hot rod, the man in the picture below is Jay Leno. And this car can absolutely steal the show on any damn show he goes on. The heart of this monster is the V-12 Chrysler tank engine, which weighs 2,000 pounds all by itself. And the best part is that the mileage on this beast is 5MPG. Most of us wont even be able to drive this shit for a whole day without going broke. Imagine Driving Down the Block listenin' to Kidz in the Hall in this:

Anonymous Gangsta

I pulled this entry from Allhiphop.com in the rumors section. For those who have heard about the rumor about how The Game and Bow Wow made a $100,000 bet on a game of Madden 09'. Surrounding the rumor The Game said that Bow Wow should also throw in Ciara as a prize and Bow Wow replied that "C" was old news, then Bow Wow said that The Game should throw in Mia. Below is the recoil of such adolescent behavior, an Anonymous person sent an email to the editor of Allhiphop.com with a reply to what Bow Wow and The Game said. If many of you do not have a clue about what I'm talking about, thats exactly my point, Bow Wow or The Game have yet to comment:

Allhiphop.com

DON’T KNOW WHO THIS IS, BUT THE GAME AND BOW WOW BEST BEWARE!

I got this letter from somebody that refused to give their name. All I can say is they seem to know a lot and is appalled at the treatment of Ciara. Check it: I don’t know nothin’ about what is fact or fiction in this email. I said that, because it’s the truth -I know nothing. Typically, I know when something is real or fake. You know I am a Game fan and have actually resolved my issues with Bow Wow, who I used to love calling Wow Bow.

I GOTTA CALL OUT BOW WOW AND GAME.. THEY LEAVE ME NO CHOICE…

First, let me start out by saying this aint a attempt to get fame or money, so I will even remain nameless.. But it just so happens that the 2 lamest n***as on the planet (besides Soulja Boy), decide to disrespect my peoples (Ciara).. I know Game and Bow Bow personally, and they know my style and how I get down. Therefore, I don’t know why they would even come out they mouth sidewayz towards Ci Ci, and they know I will break they fukin faces..But before I do that, I’ma air they asses out, and pull the sheets off they ass real quick(no homo).. I’ma start with Game….

Game’s cousin f***s with my best friend’s sister, so we have been around each other numerous times, and he always on some “lets all chill” s**t. So one weekend, me and my squad was down in Memphis, because I was meeting with some people about a nightclub im about to open out there. My n***a’s sister call and says “Game and his people out that way doin promotion, and they gonna call ya’ll so ya’ll can come to a party they throwing”.. We aint have s**t else to do, so we accepted the invite when his lame ass called. Long story short, he claims the party got cancelled, and he wanted us to meet them at the strip club. So we did.. To make another long story short, Game ends up getting his d**k sucked by a stripper, that happens to really be a MAN. I will give him the benefit of the doubt, and say that he didn’t know she was a man at first.. When this n***a came from the V.I.P, he was looking all shook-up and s**t.. He wasn’t even gonna tell us, until another female that was on my d**k all night, called it out to everyone. (I had a REAL female).. Game gets all loud and starts poppin off in the club. I was laughing, cause I know who he really is, and all that bark don’t mean s**t.. Somehow the dude/female gets his number and calls Game 2 days later. Long Story short, the dude/chick threatened to leak it out unless he broke her off some bread, and took her/him on vacation. So this n***a ends up takeing the chick/dude to Vegas for a weekend, and shells out a few thousand.. I wish Game would try to deny it, because I have the instant messages they shared, and the pics that the dude/chick took on a camera phone of him and him/her. But Game will know ecaxtly who I am when he reads this, and I pray that he acts stupid and confronts me. But I know that wont happen cause he know my resume`, and how I rock..Plus, my money too long for that clown ass n***a to try me… Lets move on to Bow Wow….

I know Bow Wow through JD (and that n***a JD owe me money for that last studio he built too, but I wont put him out there about how he broke..don’t think I forgot n***a!).. But anyways, this n***a Bow Wow talks crazy gangsta these days.. Aint you the same n***a that was harlem shakein in videos, and singing about puppy love? You are a internet/youtube/106&Park gangsta.. He failed to tell the world about how he was sick as hell when Ci Ci let his ass go.. Or about how he was calling her phone, threatening to kill himself if she didn’t call him back.. Or what about last all star weekend Bow???????? We happened to be in the same hotel, and this n***a had a broad running around telling everybody on the strip how the n***a got drunk (off some Bacardi light) and s**tted all over his bed in the room…. Also, lets tak about Candace... The Candace that burned ya ass, and caused Ci Ci to stop fukin with you in the first place.. Or how bout we leak that video of you talking about my nigaa Jim Jones? Remember that? The tape where u said he needs to stop screamin BALLIN, unless he can afford to buy instead of lease? You paid my n***a, Ransom, good money to destroy that, cause you know Capo would beat ta lil ass.. Last but not least, should we speak about how my manz fucked ya momz at the Hamptons last labor day weekend? Lets save that for another time… I just wanted to air the n***az out real quick.. And both of ya’ll know exactly who the fuck I am.. Get at me if you feel froggy.. And if Ci Ci name come out either one of ya’ll mouths again, you already know what it is.. You food n***a!

Thats A Ma'n Baby! Austin Powers

This is the most confusing photo I have ever seen from a woman taking a nude photo. What we have here ladies and gentlemen is a photo of Serena Williams in last months issue of Jade Magazine. The reason why I'm so confused is that I don't know whether to actually like the photo or whether to worry about the fact that I may like men because of how manly the upper body of this photo looks. There's no hips! I'm so confused as to whether or not this is a man with a huge soft ass of a women or a woman with a huge cut back of a man. This is one of those horseman, what do you call them? A Minotaur. Yeah that's the name. And I like Serena it's just something about this photo! Am I the only one who thinks this?

Crack is Wack Campaign!

Greetings Crackheads, Dope Fiends, Glass dick oficianado's and people from the 70's. The following may offend you all in some form or another however, the truth hurts, therefore I would like for you to view the true definition of a crack head provided by the good people of urbandictionary.com:

CRACKHEAD

People of any race that live to hit that nasty-ass rock. Usually real thin, dirty and smell like warm trash and/or spoiled milk, fecal matter, rotting corpses etc. Frequently bobbing, weaving, twitching and glitching. Large periodic spurts of energy. Always got something for sale or knows somebody that has just what you need. The most severe crackheads can be viewed in the wild missing standard items such as shoes, socks and teeth. If you come into contact with a crackhead it is suggested to secure all valuables and avoid any physical contact or direct contact with their breath (could cause dizziness and/or vomiting). If you lose property to a crackhead, accept the loss. If you find yourself chasing a crackhead, accept the loss .. crackheads are fast, they be gittin somewheres.. You ain't catching no crackhead...

Then Agree or Disagree in the Comments Section Whether the following people above are considered crack heads! And Whether or not a national campaign should be created with the money we get from raising the shit of cigarette prices. And Put these faces and similar faces on a ad on the middle of the highway and scare the shit out of our youth into not not taking drugs. Well Maybe not the Chappelle one, that might just make kids use drugs.

So You Think You Can Sing!!

Damn where the hell is Simon Cowell when you need him. What we have here is a clip of Britney Bitch! Singing through her microphone without any sync on her voice. This is just the raw microphone and her horrific screeches into the sound set. Damn, her singing sounds like a dry mouth Camel singing for some water on 42nd street. I think Ashley Simpson could sing better than her. And the crazy thing is she is making a comeback on MTV's Music Awards. I wish her all the best with getting her life together but damn leave the singing to the muchachos on the subway trains at least I'd give them a dollar. I wouldn't even waste my time downloading your album for free. HatE. HaTE . HATE!

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

Kiss The Converse!

For All My 80's Babies who remember the movie The Last Dragon. The man who played the Shogun of Harlem, Julius Carry III died of pancreatic cancer this past weekend. Although he was seen in over 100 films. Many of us will remember him for his laughter induced role in the film The Last Dragon. I think Converse should make a campaign for the scene when Shogun told Leroy to "Kiss the Converse". That scene put Chucks on the map. I mean it helped a little. But on a serious note. Here is a clip just to remember the good old days when black men had jerry curls!



P.S. And I added a little delayed voice over effect like back in the day when you use to watch those Kung Fu flicks.

Finally A Black Man Who Can Swim. And The Whole World Knows It!

If you have been living under a rock please don't read the following news article below: Because it details the 2008 Olympics which has been pretty much on the news for the past week and a half. So if you don't know by now Micheal "Fish" Phelps has 8 medals and my man below has 1. But His one is more important than all of Fish's eight combined. Why? Because Stereotypes exist because there are some truth to them.
The article below explains it all. Of how the press stretched the BLACK fact so thin that cosmetic surgery couldn't repair these marks. Damn! So What if He's Black and He can Swim! I know I cant swim, I don't need to, Cuz I can RUN!!!JUMP!!!CLIMB!!!SHOOT!!! Shall I go on?



Riding Olympic wave Bronx-born swimmer now champ in Beijing
BY EDGAR SANDOVAL and CORKY SIEMASZKO
DAILY NEWS STAFF WRITERS

Updated Tuesday, August 12th 2008, 1:05 AM


Hewitt/Getty

Cullen Jones' Olympic win will set a new standard for African-Americans.
Bronx-born swimmer Cullen Jones didn't just help power the U.S. relay swim team to Olympic gold - he just may have shattered the stereotype that blacks can't swim.

Although Jones isn't the first African-American swimmer to make the Olympic squad (he's the third), or the first to win a gold medal (he's the second), he figured in one of the most exciting races in sports history.

And that thriller will be replayed on Olympic highlight reels for generations to come. "I hope this exposure from the race today, a kid can see this and say, 'Wow, a black swimmer - and he's got a gold medal,' " Jones, 24, said. "The stigma that black people don't swim ended today."

"That's great," said Jones' teammate Michael Phelps, who also romped to victory today in the 200-meter freestyle for his third-straight gold medal of the Games.

As for Jones, the reason he began swimming in the first place is because the water nearly killed him.

Jones was 5 years old and living in Irvington, N.J., when his parents took him to a Pennsylvania water park to cool off. His mother, Debra, didn't want him to go down a slide in an inner tube because he couldn't swim.

Jones should have listened to his mother. When the inner tube flipped over, he panicked instead of letting go and then passed out.

It took CPR to bring him back to life. The next week, his mother sent him for swimming lessons at a YMCA in nearby Newark and then the John F. Kennedy Aquatic Center, which is also in Newark. Jones took to the water immediately, but wasn't a standout at first, his coaches said. "At first he was an average swimmer and he progressed," said Elliott Bradley. "The more he progressed, the better he got at it. I never thought he would go this far. I'm very proud of him."

Jimmy Wilson, the head coach at the swimming center, said Jones just worked harder than the other swimmers.

"His mom would have to drag him out of the water," he said. "He was very highly motivated. Some kids just have that glow in him. I just watched him grow."

When Jones started winning, his mom began taking him for specialized training, where he refined his swimming skills. For a time, she would get him up before dawn and take him all the way out to Long Island for 5 a.m. practices in Hempstead.

"She was very devoted," Wilson said.

Jones was acutely aware that he stood out in the mostly white sport. But it did not deter him. And if he felt uncomfortable, he did not let it show.

"My parents always believed in the fact that whenever you leave the house, you're representing the family," he said in a recent interview.

Jones' father, Ronald, who played basketball in the Bronx, died of lung cancer when the young swimmer was 16. He did not live long enough to see Jones win a college scholarship, an NCAA title and a multimillion-dollar Nike endorsement contract or help set the world record in the 4 x 100-meter relay last year.

Although Jones set an American record in the 50-meter freestyle preliminaries at Olympic swimming trials last month, he didn't qualify for any of the individual events in Beijing. So his only shot for a medal was Sunday's dramatic relay race, in which he swam the third leg.

Now Jones, who hopes to channel his Olympic success and good looks into a modeling career, is devoting himself to a foundation he started aimed at helping minority-group members learn to swim - and compete. He is dating Olympic swimmer Maritza Correia, and he still swims six hours a day, seven days a week.

Jones said blacks can swim as well as anybody. "Not many black people played golf before Tiger Woods," he said.

The Best Part of a Daily News Article are the Comments People make so here are a few:

SayWhat Aug 12, 2008 9:22:44 AM Report Offensive Post
"Wow, all these years I never knew about the stereotype that black men can't swim. I just figured they knew better money was elsewhere should they wish to pursue an athletic endeavor'

veni26 Aug 12, 2008 10:02:26 AM Report Offensive Post
Exposure to new experiences in life is so important. I think the source of this stereotype comes from the fact that most inner city blacks do not have formal training in swimming. There are limited facilities, esp. in urban area, and virtually no free training programs available. This is why so many young minority kids run the streets and get into trouble. It still stuns me when I meet someone from the WI/Caribbean who cannot swim and/or are afraid of the water. When you grow up around in communities affected by poverty, crime, drugs, un-employment, violence, "luxury activities" and "vacation sports" are the least of your concerns. The reality is, unless someone in your family swims, or you can afford private lessons, you're on your own and may never learn. Note the high number of minority swimming deaths just this summer alone in NY & NJ.

tejastiger61@yahoo.com Aug 13, 2008 1:01:41 AM Report Offensive Post
Jones statement "not many black people played golf before Tiger Woods" is so stupid and racist I can't believe he said it. And this piece of **** publication reprinted it. And why is it that the first time someone black does something like win a Olympic Gold Medal in swimming, something men and women the world over have been doing thousands of times for 100 or more years, They and I quote this rag " Cullen Jones is an ICON for African-Americans" Give Black people a break, and Cullen Jones his due for his hard work, ( the amount of pool time, weight lifting and other training the average person could not even attempt to imagine, let alone try to copy) Lets congratulate him for the huge achievements he has dedicated his life to. Not for something he was born with and has no control over. Of course I mean no disrespect to Michel Jackson. The first Black man to turn himself white, and into some sort of half man half woman, that is 100% weird. Now what was it we were talking about

Song of the Week....Being Weird is Actually Being Unique!

Shout out to Charles Hamilton. For many of you who do not know who this man is. One of the New Up and Coming Rappers out! 20 years old and running!

I want my Raise!!

Everyone needs a little laughter from time to time so I received this joke at work and I figured I'd share it with you guys. Enjoy!



I want my raise

I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:

I do physical labor..
I work at great depths.
I plunge head first into everything I do.
I do not get weekends or public holidays off.
I work in a damp environment.
I work in a dark area that has poor ventilation.
I work in high temperatures.
My work exposes me to diseases.

Reply:
Dear Penis, after assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the management denies your request for the following
reasons:
You do not work 8 hours straight
You WORK IN SHORT SPURTS AND fall asleep after EACH brief work period.
You do not always follow the orders of the management team.
You do not stay in your designated area, and are often seen visiting other locations.
You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.
You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing.
You will retire LONG before you are 65.
You are unable to work double shifts.
You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have completed the assigned task.
And if that were not all, you have constantly been seen entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags. Furthermore, perhaps you should consider the following five reasons not to be a penis..

You're bald your whole life.
You have a hole in your head.
Your neighbors' are nuts.
The guy behind you is an ass hole and...
Every time you get excited, you throw up and then faint

Bush for Brains

My fellow Americans may we bow our heads in silence as we acknowledge the Greatest
President of our time. President George W. Bush... Sike! This dudes a friggin idiot and here are a few reasons why!

Is it Dame Diddy Dame Daddy or Dame Dummy...

..."Oh I get it He's Biggie and Your Puffy". Well we all know that Dame Dash can never be Puffy. My bad Sean Diddy Combs. Well my people, "Diddy" is back at it with his new show on VH1 called "I WANT TO WORK FOR DIDDY". The show is prettey hilarious and brings to mind the original MTV Hit, "Making the Band". The topic of discussion is the humiliating cheese cake walk to Brooklyn. Alot of people gave the "Making The Band" group alot of flac for making the trek across the Brooklyn Bridge. People said you could never be a real rapper and have that hanging over your head. Yet, if it were you... I think Everybody would make that walk across the bridge. At the end of the day its about Pride vs. Paper. in life sometimes you gotta learn to swallow your pride and get this paper. Or lose your sense of yourself for the lust of the green.

I know "The D to the A to the D.D.Y" is definitely gonna have some more embarrassing scenarios in this new reality TV show. So the question remains about the people on this show. Do you think that there straight suckers for putting themselves in situations that can define their 15 minutes of fame as being an embarrasment to thier families. Damn Maybe that was harsh but shit, none of my brothers could come back home after they walked a bridge for some damn cheesecake. Let me know how you feel? leave a comment...